THANK FULLY FOR YOU, IT'S NOT REAL

I was perusing on-line through some Tigers pages looking for some sweet ass Chet Lemon pics for my desktop, when I came upon Razzball.com. It's a Fantasy Baseball Advice page, possibly run by this guy (right and up) and the link from the Chet pic sent me to the February 19th, 2009 page, where Bill Ferris from "The Detroit Tigers Weblog" was answering some pressing questions pertaining to the upcoming baseball season. The season that will wrap up tomorrow. Possibly with a Tigers' division championship? Or a colossal fall to the Twins? Anyways, I noticed that the ever helpful Bill Ferris was quite off with some of his predictions, here's how he scored:

Question 1) Last year’s acquisition of Edgar Renteria and Miguel Cabrera led to a defensive rotation that saw 3 regulars (Guillen, Cabrera, and Inge) bounce around the field. Has the musical chairs ended? Does Carlos Guillen really play the whole year in LF?

BF - "I think Guillen will get the most at-bats out there, but I’d see that being only about 60-65% or so. The impending injury to Gary Sheffield will likely free up the DH spot at some point and things will get shuffled around. I think he’ll likely fare okay at the position, but it will be other factors that may force him to move (like the need for more offense in the infield for example)".

KPW - Wrong! Sheffield is long gone to the awful Mets and having a so so year. Guillen has missed half the season with injuries and is batting a measly .246 in 268 at bats. His replacement in left, Ryan Rayburn has had a good, though limited season. (14 HR's in 110 games). Inge has been better than good enough at third (despite some tender knees) and has produced offensively as well - a career high 83 RBI's and 27 HR. He is fourth in most at bats on the team (549), behind first bagger Miguel Cabrera who has 600. Second baseman Polanco, Cabrera and Inge have combined for 70 home runs and 255 RBI's. Guillen has 11 and 40. I see plenty enough offensive in the infield, but not much Carlos anywhere. Score - 90 percent wrong.

Question 2) What are your thoughts on Verlander and Bonderman for 2009? Bounce back candidates or more challenges to come?

BF - "I expect more from both of them. I think Verlander will make the tweak or two he needs to regain his control. Plus he didn’t pitch that badly in terms of his peripherals last year, I’d expect some natural regression (progression). Bonderman I think will be a big boost to the rotation. He’s had injury problems the last 2 years, but last year’s injury should have him available to pitch the bulk of the season. Plus it gave his elbow some extra rest and I think he’ll be healthier and more effective than at any point in his career."

KPW - This one he got half right. Justin Verlander has bounced back big time from a disappointing '08 (11-17, 4.84), but who wouldn't have called that one? This year, he completely took over as the fast-working leader of an otherwise shaky rotation - and was rewarded with his second All-Star nod. He has naturally progressed (or as Bill says it, regressed) into the dominating pitcher the Tigers knew they had, but what about Jeremy Bonderman you ask? Well, Bondo has pitched a total of ten innings all year, is 0-1 and has pitched in only 20 games in the last two years combined. Because of shoulder problems, he hasn't been effective since '06 and two days ago, while mopping up in the 9th against the Twins in an 8-3 loss, he smoked Delmon Young with a thigh high behind the knee fastball - earning himself a three game suspension. Talk about regression. Score - 50% right.

Question 3) Would you take the over or under on the following HR/RBI projections: Miguel Cabrera 35/110, Gary Sheffield 20/80, Magglio Ordonez 20/100, Adam Everett 2/40?

BF - "Over, Under, Over, Push."

KPW - Wrong, Wrong, Wrong, Right. Cabrera is close (33/101), Sheffield is gone, Magglio's now Singlio 7/47 and Everett, well, you nailed that one, Billy. Score - 75 percent wrong.

Question 4) Who ends up with more saves: Fernando Rodney, Brandon Lyon, or Joel Zumaya?

BF - "Brandon Lyon. If Zumaya is healthy I think he’ll be the guy ultimately, but given that is such a big IF I’m penciling him in for 0 at the moment."

KPW - Early on, Lyon started out as the guy, but after blowing 3 out of 6 saves he lost his job to Rodney, and ultimately turned into a good set up guy (2.96 ERA) for his successor. The Dominican Ticking Time Bomb is a miraculous 36 for 37 in saves opportunities. As for the big IF, Zoomin' Joel Zumaya? Zero. (1/7 in SVO, 22 BB's/30 innings) Score - 33% right

Question 5) My blogmate Grey sports an impressive moustache. Rank the moustaches of these noteworthy Detroit Tigers baseball cap wearers: Jack Morris, Jim Leyland, Kirk Gibson, Chet Lemon, Magnum PI?

BF - "Great question. Tom Selleck in a landslide followed by Jack Morris, Kirk Gibson, Jim Leyland and lastly Chet Lemon. As an aside, I saw Tom Selleck hit a couple balls out during batting practice at Tiger Stadium one time."

KPW - Wrong again! Though Magnum PI's 'stache is nothing to scoff at and you know I love me some Chet, here's my list of top Tiger's moustaches and one television personality: Tom Brookens, Tom Brookens, Tom Brookens, Tom Brookens, Tom Brookens, Geraldo Rivera and Tom Brookens. As an aside, I think Geraldo is a terrible reporter.



DESCRIPTIONS OF TOM BROOKENS' MOUSTACHE'S:

Starting at top right corner, then going down and around the horn, ending with the biggest picture of Tommy Baseball. Got it? Here we go: "Side swingin' stache," "Playing catch in my jacket stache," "Still kinda dozy and a little hungover late morning stache," "Look at my bat, then look at my moustache! stache," "Hot corner handlebar," "Geraldo Rivera," "I'm a sexy and available third baseman stache," and "Signed, sunny and smiling, looking forward to the day stache."