GARBAGE FUN WITH TOTAL SCUM!

It didn't take an inspirational bike ride down city streets or an intuitive cruise through the county to get me thinking today. No, today's epiphany appeared as soon as I stepped foot on my front porch. I could tell right away that it wasn't mine. It couldn't be. I would never have packed it so high or used those sort of bags and, most importantly, I would never do what whoever did this to me, to anyone else. Sounds complicated but not really. It's just the simple story of the life of the person who mind's his/her own business. Mr. or Mrs. Bothers-Nobody is bound to be targeted and bothered by those who don't. I understand that a strike usually brings out the worst in people, especially one that makes your city smell, look and taste like other non-Windsorites already think it does (eg. Steven Colbert), but in times like these it's best that we stick together. The total scum should stick with (or stick to) other total scum and the other semi-normal less scum (everyone else) can stick with the other semi-normal less scum. Let me put it in simpler terms. If you're garbage pail is overflowing with garbage (like everyone else's in the city) and you decide that you're going to start throwing your garbage in other people's pails --- you are total scum. Not the semi-normal less scum, but the total package scum. If you insist on acting like total scum, do as I say. Stick with the other total scum. Simply put your garbage in the other total scum's pails and vice versa. It will be fun. However, since you're both probably unemployed, and/or lacking the basic skills or motivation to get a job, an eduction, or a clue, there's probably a good chance that most of your wasted life is spent smoking cheap cigarettes on your dilapidated front porch, or watching The Tyra Banks show or Judge Whoeverbitch, and it may be difficult to sneak a fast one on you. But give it a try. Maybe you'll get in a dirty street fight with another total scum like yourself and get sent to jail or kicked out of Windsor. It could be fun. Maybe. We'll call the game Garbage Fun with Total Scum. The winner gets to work for free for the city picking up garbage once the strike is finally over and the loser continues living life as a total loser. I mean total scum. Trash on Windsor!